Sunday 18 March 2012

Squeezing our fat bits, pinching our shrimps

I read in The Times a week or two ago an article suggesting that the huge economic success of Spanx (elasticated underwear that holds all your fat bits in... apparently), could be seen as a metaphor for Britain's economic woes. I won't direct you to The Times Online because you have to pay to access it (now, is that a sign of the times?) However - you get the gist.

I actually thought it was nonsense and presumed that we are all lazy and have excess fat - both literal and metaphorical - that we are too undisciplined to deal with.  To continue in a similar fashion I suggest that most of the people I know have no excess 'fat' to squeeze and squidge to fit into the Coalition's version of elasticated restraint wear. But prepare to breathe in because the budget is imminent. 

On a lighter note, I have an idea that what we need is a return to the days when 'never a borrower or a lender be' was considered sensible advice.

As a pupil  at  boarding school though most of the 70's I became accustomed  to my pocket money being sent to the school in half-termly increments and doled out at weekly intervals. I can't remember how much we were allowed to have, but it was pence rather than pounds.

Each week we had to 'purchase' a stamp from our allowance, we were obliged to write a letter home every Monday morning, a list was made of the amount to be taken (I wonder how much a stamp was in 1972?). Every school day we were allowed access to the Tuck Shop where such treats as Black Jacks, Fruit Salads and foam shrimps were available. Anything we 'bought' was added up and recorded in the book and by Saturday the weekly spend was deducted from our pocket money.

On Saturday morning, before our trip into Teignmouth or Torquay, we waited outside Miss Batt's office for her to call us in, one by one, to hand us what was left of our money. in my case It was usually a very small amount (I still can't resist the lure of  'tuck'), but I always knew I had 'saved' something for Saturday.


What this ritual of using debit did was give me a very realistic and grounded perspective where money was concerned. I don't anticipate Osborne being equal to Aunty Nora (Miss Batt), but she had something right didn't she.



If you have the urge for a shrimp try  www.aquarterof.co.uk/Best_Retro_Sweets or in Worcester Zendels at 98 The High Street.

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